How to Work With Your Young Athlete’s Coach

Coaches work with young athletes to explain the sport, the rules, giving exercises and practice drills to learn skills and more. As the coach brings the team up to speed, they also play a big role in supporting the kids’ physical and mental health.

How should you regard your child’s coach? It may help if you think of them as one of your own teammates. You’re both working to provide your child with a positive, safe space to try new things, learn skills and grow as an athlete and person. You can respect their role in your child’s life and have ongoing conversations with them over the course of the season to advocate for your child.

Remember, healthy relationships with adults are great for a child’s mental health, so you can also encourage your child to have open communication with their coach. You can be a great model for how to do this! Show your student athlete how to have regular positive interactions with their coach. They’ll know they can depend on you if tough conversations come up and may even feel encouraged to speak up and advocate for themselves!

It’s important to respect your child’s coach, even if you don’t agree with every decision. Don’t share negative comments in front of your child or other parents. If your child overhears your unflattering comments about the coach’s decisions or the team’s performance, it may cause anxiety, anger, or other strong emotions.

How should you build a relationship with your child’s coach?

Try these ideas:

• Introduce yourself to the coach at the start of the season, and wave hello during games and practices.
• Ask if there are ways you can help your child improve their skills or mindset between practices.
• You may want to ask your student athlete if they know of any ways you can help the team, whether that’s providing snacks, rides or other assistance.
• Find out if your child’s sports league has rules or procedures for approaching coaches when you have concerns. There may also be policies within the league’s handbook that spell out the proper ways to address concerns.
• Discuss any questions about their health that you have, including possible overtraining or over conditioning. If your child has an injury or having a difficult time managing the stress or pressure, talk about how it will impact the coach’s approach to practice or games.
• If you notice that your child’s attitude or on-the-field performance has declined, talk to the coach about possible reasons, including burnout.
• Schedule a meeting with the coach to address unhealthy practices that you may witness, like the coach yelling or using disparaging language when talking to the team.
• Wait 24 hours to talk to the coach about questionable game-day decisions, like taking your child out of play. The cool-off period should allow you to speak more calmly, which may result in a better resolution for your child.

Your student athlete’s coach is in a unique position to speak to your child about mental and physical health. Having trusted adults they can count on is good for children’s mental health.